wait, what?

Where I work at a children's clothing store, when someone does a return, I am required to ask the reason. Most of the time, the customer answers with one of two things: (1) It didn't fit, or (2) he/she didn't like it.

The past few days, I've been doing a lot of returns, and I've noticed some people get really lengthy about their reason. I have to fit their reason into a category to type into the cash register (for example "poor fit," "size exchange," "customer preference," or "defective.")

Today, I filed two particular returns under "customer preference," and I cannot stop thinking about either.

First, a women came in with various pieces of clothing in toddler sizes. She had a skirt, sweater, sweatshirt and tights. Each piece was pink. When I asked her the mandatory "was there anything wrong with these?" she said "No, I just absolutely do not allow my daughters to wear pink." She then proceeded to spend the next half hour searching our store for non-pink toddler girl clothing (it was not easy). **

The next return I processed was for a boy's size large long sleeved t-shirt featuring The Incredible Hulk, Wolverine, Captain America and Iron Man. I love this t-shirt, and I have even considered squeezing my not-skinny self into the largest size. Whenever a little boy picks it out, I tell them about how it is my favorite. When I asked the customer the reason for the return, she explained, "Well, all of my kids are really into comic books. My ex bought this shirt for all of my kids. It's alright for the boys, but girls just can't wear shirts like this."

Wait, what?

Maybe it was because pink is my favorite color and I can't imagine telling a child they can't wear color they like. Maybe it was because the other women returned a shirt I had considered buying for myself saying it was something girls shouldn't wear. I keep wondering if the children had any say in if their Christmas presents got returned.

If pink is typically for girls, then why is it bad for a girl to look "typical?" Is there something wrong with looking like a girl? Does prohibiting a color make it more appealing? Shouldn't a child's words, thoughts and actions tell more about them than what color they are wearing? If a child's clothes are comfortable, well fit, and warm does it matter what color they are? Can girls like pink and also be empowered, smart and thoughtful?

If comic books are typically for boys, what happens when girls like them? Will people automatically assume she is a boy for wearing a shirt from the boy's department? Do they only sell Avengers Comics to men and boys? Is there anything wrong with being a boy? How is this girl going to feel when all of her brothers have the same shirt, but hers was returned because she is a girl?

What are the gift-givers going to say when they never see these children wearing these particular items of clothing?

Is anyone else infuriated by this? I grew up wearing clothes from the boys and girls departments, and I didn't grow up to be any less of a girl.

We should spend more time teaching our kids to be grateful for a gift they receive, instead of deciding on their behalf that something needs returned because a well-meaning relative bought it in the wrong color/department.

**I am obviously not sure, but by the tone of her voice, I assumed the "no pink" rule had to do with gender stereotypes, and not wanting her daughters to fit them.

Lend me your ears and I'll sing you a song

I've decided I'll start writing in this blog again. I want to write in it more often, given that exciting things happen in my life that are worth commenting on. I think I'll try to update it once a week.

It's Sunday and here are my current thoughts/life updates:

• -"The Wonder Years" on Netflix is really stopping me from getting anything productive done. I've watched 20 episodes of it in the past 2 weeks. I was really surprised that one of my co-workers wasn't familiar with this show, because I just assumed it was sort of a staple of everyone's TV watching. I also like Winnie's glasses and all of her tucked in shirts with belts.

"Once upon a time, there was a girl I knew that lived across the street. Brown hair. Brown eyes. When she smiled, I smiled. When she cried, I cried. Every single thing that ever happened to me that mattered, in some way, had to do with her." - Kevin Arnold

• I've been thinking a lot about some of the things I'd like to do this summer. I want to start planning ahead, mostly because I'm excited, but also because this is very likely the last summer I'll in that area. I'm definitely going to Washington DC at the beginning of June, but I'd like to make a lot of smaller trips to places like the Smorgasboard, Chip Factory Tour, and the Diner. Just in case I don't get to go to those places again.
  

• One of my friend's favorite quotes is: "the key is to surround yourself with people who uplift you, who bring out your best." I've been focusing on this lately because it makes a difference to every aspect of my life. I have made a great effort to surround myself only with people who are not judgmental. Knowing I can be open and honest with my friends is making my life more positive. I am a better person because of the choices I've made lately, and one of those choices has to do with who I spend my time with. Thanks for that, friends.
  

• And finally, my dad's cousin just posted on Facebook: "Insanity does not run in my family. It strolls through, takes it's time and gets to know everyone personally." I think this is hilarious.
  

some good news...

"Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has."
-Margaret Mead

No matter how many times I hear that, it still always sticks with me. Today, it proved itself true again. You might not count this as "saving the world," but it really will change the lives of a lot of kids I know. I think the best part is that the kids were so directly involved in all the petitioning/noise-making. I just hope that everyone stays optimistic and this can be a long-term thing, instead of just one summer...

Oxford; or, Life in the Woods

I had a hard time deciding if I wanted to go back to work at camp this summer. I spent a lot of late winter and early spring debating if it made sense financially, logistically, etc. As soon as I arrived in Oxford, I knew I made the right decision.

2011 was the best summer I've ever experienced. It wasn't perfect. It was far from perfect. In this one summer I heard more bad news and had more challenges than I have ever experienced. I have never had so many conflicts with the people I love. I have never been physically ill so many times in such a short period of time. I have never experienced so many days of extreme heat. I have never seen so many children cry every Thursday night, not because they were sad to be there, but sad because they can never come back. I have never felt so much pain over leaving a place. Despite all of these hardships, I awoke every morning thinking about how much I didn't want the summer to end.

Sometimes you end up finding a home somewhere you never expected. There's a part in the movie Garden State where Sam and Andrew are talking about the houses they grew up in. Andrew says at some point he realized that the house he grew up in is just wear he keeps is stuff and the feeling of home is gone. Sam says she still feels at home in her house and Andrew says:

"You'll see one day when you move out it just sort of happens one day and it's gone. You feel like you can never get it back. It's like you feel homesick for a place that doesn't even exist. Maybe it's like this rite of passage, you know. You won't ever have this feeling again until you create a new idea of home for yourself, you know, for your kids, for the family you start, it's like a cycle or something. I don't know, but I miss the idea of it, you know. Maybe that's all family really is. A group of people that miss the same imaginary place."

That's sort of how I feel about camp right now. A group of people that all miss the same imaginary place. I love being around Akron and all my family and friends here, but I have felt so disconnected since I've been in Ohio. Over the past four years I've created a second home for myself in the middle of nowhere Pennsylvania. I always told people that even my hometown was boring; I wanted to move away and go to a city and do really exciting, glamorous things. There's a lot of irony in the idea that the home I've created for myself is in a town no one has heard of, where 40 people share two showers and I can't get enough cell phone service to answer a call.

I don't know if we'll ever get to go back, and if we do, I don't know if it will ever be the same. I like the security of a bug free home with walls, but I'd give that up for the comfort of a friend being in the bed next to me. I like having my own car around, but I miss my best friend's voice during our dramatic car sing-alongs. I surely don't miss saying "CIT's GO TO BED" every night, but I miss those kiddos every day and I worry about how their first weeks of school went. If circumstances were different, maybe I would decide I didn't want to work at camp next year, but given the situation now, all I want is for that magic to continue for these kids. I want those kids to get to experience the stay up to late-"firefly" all night-eat too much-cry too often-hug all the time family that comes with being on staff.

Henry David Thoreau wrote in 1854, " "I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived."

I've read Walden many times, but this piece of it stands out to me more now than it ever has before. I came to camp this summer expecting to teach teenagers how to be good camp counselors. I never imagined what they would have to teach me.

I expected I would make friends this summer, but I had no idea how the backdrop of nature would enhance those friendships. I had no idea that this summer would be the summer where I finally understood where I fit in this world.

Thanks for that.

10 things

10. Subbing isn't so bad. If I have to do it another year, I can handle that.
9. I've discovered a gas station that gives you .04 cents off a gallon if you pay in cash, and it's also the cheapest one in town to begin with.
8. Has anyone ever had hair tinsel done? I want to get it done for the summer, but I want to know if it's worth by $18.
7. Speaking of things I want, all I want for Christmas is a new set of nice Hogwarts robes. Maybe you all can collaborate.
6. Lady Gaga's childhood piano and meat dress are allegedly in Cleveland at the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Please contact me if you are up for an adventure.
5. Judy Moody and the Not Bummer Summer. Who is going to see it with me?
4. I leave for my $11.50 cent bus trip very soon. I'm seeking people with music they want to put on a cd for me to put in my ipod. I'm seeking Katy Perry, Beyonce, and Glee especially.
3. I've read almost all the books on my Nook. I'm also seeking summer book suggestions.
2. If you want my address for this summer ask me.
1. I'm tired of people being negative. We all have roofs over our heads, shoes on our feet, food to eat, internet and education. Negativity breeds more negativity. You need to spend time with people who bring out your best.

Easter!!

The tomb is empty! He has risen!! Jesus is alive!!!

Happy Easter!!!

Making the World a Better Place?

I am NOT proud to say I'm a Girl Scout today.

Juliette Gordon Low did not create an organization for girls to attend "premier leadership camps."

Read:

http://www.ohio.com/news/119983854.html